selfinteresting | 03

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03 | Video

[Remember this picture, Ange? (doesn't Battler look like a dork (doesn't dad look as cool as ever)) Mom managed to find it. And now it's being broadcast, isn't it great...

]

Happy birthday, Ange~ Will you come over for dinner tonight? We can have a little party just like we used to. Well, not quite the same seeing as your father isn't around, but we all know the highlight is having Battler there anyway.
I want to make up for our absence, in some small way.

[Locked from Ange]

I'm extending an open invitation to any of Ange's friends as well. I'll be making dinner as well as dessert and you're welcome to stay as little or long as you like. The only condition is, please keep it a secret from Ange, I want it to be a surprise.

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[Indeed, see? He's a perfect addition to the family. Rudolph, Battler and Keiichi can just go to family conferences carrying guns and raging at anyone who looks too much at their granddaughter/niece/daughter respectively.]

Really? That's awesome then, but it wouldn't feel right to not give anything in exchange. That way Battler and Ange won't have to be embarrassed next time you broadcast a picture.

[Because you will be broadcasting one of his. Probably, he doesn't put it above you and yes he accepts it. If it's the mother-in-law she can do whatever she wants, she has mother-rights after all.]

[She's glad he's so accepting of how it is to be an Ushiromiya. Even her own children don't understand.]

Maybe I'll put you two side-by-side and have Luceti try to guess who the adorable couple is!

[If you ask him it's more how to be Keiichi Maebara than to be an Ushiromiya, but whatever.]

... Wow, way to make me feel divided. That's equally embarrassing and endearing, though I suppose it depends on which pictures you use.

[There are some pictures who are worse than others after all. That one she has broadcasted? Isn't that bad, one of them learning to use the toilet? That's a bad one.]

Something adorable, of course.

[Sorry Keiichi, that means it could just as easily be one of the incredibly embarrassing ones. If you hand them over to her, they're hers to do with as she pleases.]

I bet you would consider adorable even the most embarrassing ones like any mother would. Ah, it's useless, my pride as an adult may be threatened but my pride as a man and Ange's boyfriend says that I can't back down just for something like this. I wouldn't be a man worth of her if I ran away from just this.

[Yeah, the "it's useless" part is something Ange and Battler have rubbed on him apparently.]

Okay! Bring it on, I'll give you copies of all my childhood pictures, Kyrie-san, don't disappoint me in your next move regarding them!

[Troll him to your hearts content, Kyrie, he's ready for it.]

[She laughs] Have I told you how much I like you lately? You're the perfect son-in-law, well, you would be, anyway. Am I getting a little ahead of myself thinking that way?

I'll be sure to come up with a good plan for each and every picture, you can count on me!

[He laughs as well.]

I'm honored that you think that way Kyrie-san, but yeah, maybe we're getting a little ahead by thinking about that. I can't say I don't think about it myself though, it hasn't left my mind since Ange accepted to date me.

[As stupid and idiotic it may be, he can't deny it. He doesn't even want to deny it.]

I look forward to Kyrie-san embarrassing me enough that our children will still feel the shame of it all.

[Is she the type to troll even her grandchildren or not? Not that it matters either way.]

That aside, is there anything I can do to help with the party or anything else?

[Once they're teenagers, yes. It's no good to tease kids.]

Well, I asked Minato to find a way to keep her from looking out the window or coming over until everyone's around, maybe you could help out there? We'll need someone in the house with her and someone who's over here to give the go-ahead. [She laughs] Basically we need an entire secret service force.

[Good to know she has limits.]

I would be the one to give the go-ahead. Because if I'm with her I may be tempted to just take her with me somewhere else just the two of us.

[Not serious, he wouldn't do that knowing there's a party going on for her. But he would be tempted, that's true. Then again he plans on taking her for a couple of days alone after he ends with his missions so it's not as if he can't wait.]

Ah, I see, you can't be trusted, then. Sorry, but you won't have the high privilege of spending time alone with her.

Of course, all rights will be returned once the party is over.

[Uh oh, don't tell her that or she'll tease both of them that they must be sleeping together!!]

No, I can't. But I bet you would want the same if it was your husband and his birthday, ditch the kids and friends and just go on a trip the two together or something. At least I'm aware myself of it so I know to not put myself in a tempting position, Ange wouldn't forgive me if I stole her from time with her family after all... Maybe for stealing her from time with friends but family is a big no-no.

[And the friends it's mostly because she's tsun and Ange, of course. And they have slept together already! In the same room in different beds... And he was a bear. It's a long and no-adult story.]

We usually do that on the weekend of birthdays and anniversaries, yes. But we're a married couple, you see. Wouldn't it be scandalous for you two to do the same? [giggle]

[Oh she doesn't have that kind of 'sleeping together' in mind, this is the tmi family after all.]

Well, what can I say? Times change, what was scandalous then isn't scandalous now. And it's not as if we would share a bed or anything. I was thinking spending a day at the hot-springs, you know? The springs are close enough for us to be able to still talk while we are there if we want, or we could just relax. And then spend the rest of the time just lazing around together. Oh, I could try to convince her to pose for a painting, that would be nice. And during dinner maybe I could convince her to give me something from her plate and I could give something from mine to her...

[Lots of cuddling time, basically. The sad thing is that he is so infatuated that even those childish plans make him laugh in embarrassment as if he was talking about seeing her naked.]

I guess it could be scandalous since we would share a room even if we slept in different futons but I don't care.

[And they have to be futons, it can't be beds. Don't ask why.]

Besides it's not as if I've plans of ever being with another girl, even if there's no ceremony or papers or even a ring yet [Yet is the key word there.] I consider myself as good as married to her. There's just no one else worth of it.

[After listening to everything...Kyrie laughs, Keiichi's way too trustworthy and sappy, even if she flat out told him to try to push things a little further, he would just want to hold Ange's hand, wouldn't he?]

You two are just too good, aren't teenagers supposed to be rebellious? I'm supposed to be sitting at home, wondering what my daughter is doing out so late with a boy!

Oi, oi, I'm very rebellious! I rebel against many things, I'm not the type to sit and take everything going my way with a smile and a nod! And I guess you could do that bit of wondering for when I'm thirty-four or so.

[And again, you don't want to ask why.]

Shouldn't you be glad you don't have to worry? Worrying brings wrinkles to one's face and you look so young that it would be a waste.

[Giggle] Ah, now you're flattering me? You really are a keeper. Don't think it will be so easy to shake us off if you try to run off, now.

Why would I want to shake anyone off? Specially when it's regarding Ange, if I could I would just make sure that you are the ones unable to get away from us so Ange can be with you forever. I don't accept just half happiness when I can aim for the full set.

[The worst part of all of this is just how convinced he sounds, he really wants that and aims for it if possible. This guy has issues accepting fate, honestly.]

And if I wanted to flatter you I would say that ever since meeting you I've had no need to wonder from where Ange got her looks or why she's so pretty.

[She laughs] See, you really are flattering me! But we all know Ange is perfect, much better than I could ever be.

You won't have any trouble from me, I want to stay. Not only do I have nothing to go to, but with both Ange and Battler here, I need to stay.

I agree with you. I feel the same, for Ange and the friends I've made here. Even if I've friends waiting at Hinamizawa as well, those are safe, I know that, so there's no need for me to worry.

That's right, besides, anyone you know from home could just as well show up here. People never want to move away from their friends, but once they get settled, the new home isn't so bad at all, and would be just as difficult to leave.

That's true... Though when we moved to Hinamizawa from Tokyo I was actually happy about it even if I knew no one there.

[Then again, those were... Special circumstances.]

Oh, you lived in Tokyo?

[She won't ask the reason he was happy for it, it's clear enough it's something that would likely be a touchy subject.]

I was glad to leave Kyoto as well, sometimes it's just a toxic environment you need to get out of.

Yeah, I was born and raised there until not long ago... In Earth time terms, it has been over two years now counting the time here, of course.

[He nods at her comment, though in his case he can't help to think that maybe the toxic thing was himself rather than the environment. Then again Hinamizawa had been quite toxic as well when he arrived, until everyone opened the windows to let fresh air enter the place. What's stagnant air in one place can be fresh air in another?]

Indeed, sometimes change is just needed to survive. Or rather to improve. You can survive by always staying the same and doing the same things all the time, but that's all there is to it. Nothing new and at the end you just whither without having done anything new. Moving out sometimes is really the only way to avoid that.

That's right, you always have to find someone new and exciting one way or other, otherwise you fall into routine and certainly can't grow as a person.

Find someone new or become someone new, it's the same difference if done right. A bit of routine isn't terribly bad, though, is it?

03 | Video

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